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Score ballsBALM™ here.

Our clients have the option of buying directly from or from one of our partners listed on this page. Check below to purchase, and for descriptions about your favorite ballsBALM™ products. Cheers.

The goods.

We aim to Please.

100% Satisfaction Guaranteed.

If for ANY reason you are not completely satisfied with ANY purchase from ballsBALM™ then simply return the unused portion of the product(s) to the place of purchase within thirty (30) days from the date on your receipt for a full refund.  No questions asked.    

Always discreet shipping.

Confidential shipping on every order.

We've had nosy roommates, neighbors, coworkers, and mail carriers too, that's why all orders ship on the down low.  If you want to ensure that your order arrives to you with as little fanfare as possible, rest assured.  All orders ship from third party fulfillment facilities and are inconspicuously packaged in USPS Priority Mail  packaging with absolutely no mention of the contents on the outside.  So order, we won't ship and tell. 

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Coming soon from the junkworks™


Bros stick together, your 'boys' shouldn't.


We gave the junkWORKS™ an impossible task: neutralize balls’ tendency to painfully stick to the thigh. For eons, every man—from the mightiest king to the lowliest bus boy—has been slave to ‘Sticky Balls Syndrome’ (SBS).  No more.  After months of testing, calibrating and clinical trials, we got word from truckers, athletes, cops, soldiers, and even a troupe of clowns that ballsAWAY™ is the Holy Grail of crotch comfort.  Get some and feel what it’s like to really free ball, good sir.  


Make love, not a mess.

Like any high-intensity, friction-full activity, sex requires well-placed ‘moisture’. But traditional lubricants are messy and cumbersome to use.  Enter laySPRAY™ a fully-functional, spray-on ‘friction-fighter’ that lets you slick up any part you’ve got, without the waste and chaos you get palming the ‘jellys and jams’ available now.  So if you want a ‘smoother’ marathon session without the mess, or just a quickie without getting sticky, add laySPRAY™ to your kit and stop apologizing for the lube puddles you’re leaving everywhere.  


Smell fair everywhere.

Need to 'clear the air down there'? Skip the cologne and harsh deodorants that scorch the skin and leave it susceptible to rashes and irritation.  Use ballsBALM™  dicSTIC™ instead.  A simple, safe, and effective way to fight the BO down low, it's an all-the-time solution for your active lifestyle.  A lite, classic scent with none of the harsh perfumes clouding up your real essence.  Goes on clear and won't let you down, even after 12-hours grinding on the beach, dicSTIC™ is the perfect tool to keep yourself crisp and ready for snacking. 


Wax on. Hair off.

A wise man once told us that a guy is only as successful as his options. At ballsBALM™ we strive to give our clients access to the best and most complete set of tools to manage their body hair to stay at the top of their game.  To do that the ballsBALM™ Bare Collection™ is expanding to include The ballsBALM™ ballsWAX™ Kit.  Calibrated to our exacting specifications, our ballsWAX™ Kit is an essential addition for any man that takes body hair management seriously.


Spiffy in a jiffy.

Got a majorly messy situation on your hands...or any other part of you?  Towel off with ballsBALM™ tipTOPS™ and get clean as a whistle instantly with our super-sensitive cleansing towels.  Designed for the discriminating gentleman, our flushable tipTOPS™ come in low-profile, easy-to carry packaging so you can take them anywhere you need to clean up, discreetly. tipTOPS™ come extra large, so you can always be sure you get the job done when you need to prime your shine and conditions are less than ideal.